“The moment that we believe that success is determined by an ingrained level of ability we will be brittle in the face of adversity” ~ Josh Waitzin
Did I know I was different? Maybe. Physically I was born with dislocating hips and club feet. My father was a policeman. Where we tended to live, this was considered to be attached too. So much so that when young the owner of two stations set them onto my Jack Russel. Not a great memory to repress. Mentally the answer was until 2009 I actually thought that I was considered dumb. A dim-wit. My friends could write and do things that mattered to me. What I learned was to keep going and that when you got to the point you had succeeded that far. Next step was…
Although I do not consciously recall the majority of the negatives, I do recall a few teachers that are special to me – all male. Later in life when I needed to show someone how to do something it was done modeling on these people’s methods.
I knew that I had to do homework differently. Last minute cramming for a test was useless After nearly 50 years the words a mental block finally made sense. Short term was great. Middle forget about!. Once in the information stayed there. Even ofter a truck impact in 1991 the information would stay there. So much so that it was locked down and not allowed out. No memories at all. Which of course was frustration as things would be done intuitively with no recollection rational or reasoning behind them. So we went a two-hour drive to the library for books to research thing with.
Helping our older with early schooling and then the oldest boy with preschool class time through the home study was terrific.
Simple, as I had the basics of learning connections happening. Our oldest daughter was seven at the time and, unknowingly, was teaching me to read and maths. To guide someone through correspondence, something one needs to be able to read right? To read stories, one needs to know the words. How to use grammar. The lessons taught it Practice it!
Though with two high-functioning boys and a girl plus a baby. Nearly always with no car and an extremely limited knowledge of the world. We lived in the bush. At least 2 of the world’s first seven deadly snakes lived in that area of bushland.
Until I learned what a snake was I was a danger to the children’s safety.
While I made the intuitive sounds, the pictures showed she would read out loud. Then the other children followed. Just after they went to bed, I was in bed exhausted. Out light a light. Mental overload just from the children being read a golden book.
Schooling for myself was horrible. Spelling took all my time. They did not have the world for dyslexia then other that ” what is this trash” “you can do better” and I can remember something about a ‘Z’ grade. Had I fallen asleep during the lessons on spelling?
Computers became fun once I realised what the little green and red squiggly lines were. Plus the computer would remember the mistakes and after everything was written proofread was far quicker than the laborious job it was before. Nore did I have to write the 30 copies of the same page just to get the spelling right. Hence the ‘big’ printing. Or the scrawly tiny thin lettering. Harder to read the mistakes. Computers, well you hit the error, and there is the selection. Hopefully on the first time.
Although I now use willingly an application for this correcting situation as when things are written, the mistakes are still there. Now my fingers do the talking. They create the pictures that are used in the blog posts. And if I have made a spelling mistake in a quote the tool that is used has a method of just going back into the library and changing the spelling, finalising and downloading the original.
In answer to the “did I know I was different ” question. Yes. I became aware of that. Just not what to do to improve and become like anyone else and achieve at something like everyone else was doing So I know now I am different. Yes. And thankfully you will not have gone through the things that I have experienced. Life would be extremely boring if we were all the same.